As moms we set the tone for our households.
I know, your to-do list is already 10 miles long and now here I am saying that you have to set the tone for your home… but hear me out.
We all know the saying, if mama ain’t happy ain’t nobody happy. And while I don’t really like that because I think it implies that if mama is unhappy she’ll be grumpy and bring everyone down with her, it is honestly true.
Side note- I could be wrong in my interpretation, I always thought the saying “pure as the driven snow” was sarcastic, because the snow that has been driven in is really mucky and gross…. I only learned I was wrong like 3 years ago!
When we are stressed or feeling grumpy, or if we’ve got tons of energy and feel amazing, our home tends to follow suit. Our energy sets the tone for our families and so it’s important we’re mindful of that.
You may think your 2-year-old with a bad attitude sets the tone or your angsty teen, but in reality, you have most of the power for keeping things in your house upbeat, or relaxed or stressed.
Don’t believe me? Take a book and sit down on your couch with a cup of tea nice and relaxed. If your house is like mine within minutes you’ll be joined by a kid, a dog, and a cat. When we have a ton on our minds and are feeling overwhelmed our kids tend to act up more, things get broken and spilled, and our stress level continues to climb.
If you are feeling relaxed and happy your kids tend to be more pleasant, and if they do get crabby and accidents happen you handle them with more grace and ease.
Our husbands pick up on our tension, they pick up on our stress and often that adds even more to our home. I know if my house is a disaster and I’m feeling overwhelmed my husband picks up on it and he starts to feel the same way, then we’re both snippy with the kids and then they are in a bad mood…. It’s a vicious cycle folks, and it all starts with us.
So how can we try our best to set the tone for a stress-free and happy home? We can work on regulating our own moods, we can learn to have peace inside us that helps us process stress better and move through our days feeling great.
I have a few suggestions that work really well for me!
Get up before the kids for some quiet time- Start your day with a little time to yourself. As moms we don’t get a lot of quiet time to just think for ourselves. It’s hard with hectic schedules so getting up just a little bit before your kids each morning so you can have a cup of coffee in quiet helps set the tone for a great day.
Take care of yourself- I am always preaching self-care and this is a huge part of why! We must take the time to take care of ourselves because when we feel good we are better moms and wives. Self-care looks different for everyone, it may mean having one day a week where you go to the grocery store by yourself and get a coffee from your favorite coffee shop. It may mean setting aside 30 minutes every day to curl up with a good book. It may even be more practical and be saying no to another obligation or asking your family for help. Whatever it looks like for you make sure you are intentional about taking care of you!
Related Post- Self Care is Not Selfish
Practice meditation- Meditation has been a huge help to both me and my husband. I use an app and try to set aside 10 minutes a day (often it is right before bed) to just quiet my mind and get nice and relaxed. Meditation isn’t some kind of woo woo practice, it is scientifically proven to help ease stress, improve health, help with sleep… it helps all kinds of things, including your attitude!
Find your favorite mood changer– Woke up in a funk? Have some terrible PMS? What can you do to change your mood? Different people need different things, maybe turn up some music and dance it out, maybe hop on the treadmill for 20 minutes, maybe a nap or some yoga. You might take a little walk or snuggle with your kids on the couch. Find what works for you to improve your mood and be ready to use it when a bad day strikes.
One of the biggest factors in monitoring our moods and attitude is just self-awareness and realizing what we need to do to feel our best and change our attitude if necessary. When we become aware of our effect on the vibe in our house we realize it’s totally worth the effort to try and be as happy and relaxed as we can every day!
Don’t think of it as another thing that you have to be responsible for along with the laundry and taxing the kids to their activities, think of it as the amazing influence you have as a mom and how important your well being is to your whole household!
You are so important momma, and you deserve to move through your day feeling awesome so take these suggestions and figure out what works best for you to have amazing days!